P is for Person: Remembering Who You Are in a Mother’s Rule of Life
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There is a quiet truth many mothers learn the hard way: you can give and give and give, and still feel empty. Not because you are doing motherhood wrong, but because somewhere along the way, you disappeared from your own life.
This post is part of my Mother’s Rule of Life series, inspired by A Mother’s Rule of Life by Holly Pierlot. The second P in a Mother’s Rule of Life is Person.
Even with prayer rhythms, daily schedules, or household systems, a Rule of Life must include the recognition that you are a whole person. Not just a role. Not just a helper. Not just the glue holding everyone else together.
What Does “Person” Mean in a Mother’s Rule of Life?
We talked in the last blog post about how ultimately God has called each of us to live out a vocation. Mothers and wives are called to fulfill their mission as such.
“Our souls possess the powers of intelligence and will: our ability to know and think, and our ability to choose. And in the center of our souls is a secret place called the ‘heart.’ It’s the seat of our emotions and the truest part of our personality.”
Pierlot emphasizes the first part of taking care of our person is to care for our spiritual health. We need to commit to adhering to the moral norms God revealed to us.
Once we get our spiritual health in check, we must also work on our physical health. She mentions that our personal needs are just as important as any other responsibility. How can we fulfill our purpose well if we aren’t taking care of ourselves? We must make care for ourselves a top priority.
How I’m Taking Care of My Person
There are several things I’m doing this year to help take better care of my own person. Pierlot spent a lot of the chapter talking about going through a depression and seeking out a spiritual director who helped her through that time in her life. I do not feel like I need to do any of those things at this time, but I definitely need to step up my game and take better care of myself.
Supplements
I’ve started with getting back on my supplements. I take a multi-vitamin, Vitamin D, fish oil, a probiotic, and magnesium.
Obviously, this is not medical advice. I’m simply sharing what I am doing for myself at this time. I use a powder magnesium supplement in my nighttime tea. I love the Chamomile Honey Vanilla tea from Celestial Seasonings. My magnesium supplement is from the Wellness store.
My supplements seem to help with energy, sleep, and some muscle cramps and headaches I tend to get.
Diet and Exercise
My diet has been something I’ve needed to work on for a while. With the cost of groceries so high, I have to try to make better choices that the entire family can eat. I’ve decided to eat mostly whole foods for now, incorporating more fiber and protein in my diet. I’m also trying really hard to cut my sugar way back.
I’ve looked into low carb diets, but carbs are inexpensive and filling. I still eat a mindful portion of rice with dinner and potatoes with the skin on for the fiber. I’m also aiming to add in more beans and lentils because fiber is just so important.
Although I have weight to lose, I’m more focused on feeling better as opposed to being a certain size or weight.
This leads me to exercise. I have not exercised regularly since last summer. My goal is to get back into a place where I was exercising four times a week. I would do 20-30 minutes of a walk at home video with a weighted vest, and 20-30 minutes of weight training. I prefer kettlebells and I use free YouTube videos for all of my workouts.
I am pretty out of shape right now and busy with homeschooling, so I’m starting with two workouts per week. I’m doing the walk-at-home workouts and plan to add the strength training back in when I’m comfortable with that.
My biggest issue with this is time. I just cannot workout in the mornings and I’m finding myself completely wiped in the evenings. That leaves the afternoon which is not always free. I’m setting up some boundaries and planning to make sure no events or appointments are scheduled on Tuesday or Thursday afternoons.
I’m also making sure I schedule my own medical and dental appointments so I can take care of those needs, as well.
Skincare
Now that I’m in my late 30s I’m noticing changes with my skin. I started a skincare routine some time ago, but I’ve added a few things that really seem to help. I use a variety of brands including Sei Bella (from the Wellness store), Paula’s Choice, Cerave, Equate (Walmart brand has good dupes for Cerave), and my new favorite, Good Molecules. Here’s what I’m using (not all at the same time, of course):
- Gua sha with Honey and Rosewater Mist or Rosehip Oil (reduces puffiness and inflammation)
- Niacinimide Serum (makes my skin feel so smooth)
- BHA exfoliant
- Retinol cream
- Vitamin C serum
- Sun block (I like this one under makeup)
- Nighttime Moisturizer
- Face wash
Mother Culture
Finally, I am continuing on with my practice of Mother Culture. I’m reading all kinds of books, trying new hobbies, and just generally trying to fill my cup as much as time allows.
I encourage you to check out my posts all about Mother Culture to learn more.
How are you taking care of your person?
Posts you may have missed:
Creating a Mother’s Rule of Life – How I’m Slowly Changing My Days
P is for Prayer: Building a Realistic Prayer Life as a Mother
