My Deployment Journal – Ponderings

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 deployment journal

As I sit in my cozy home the snow falls outside. It’s the second snow of the year, which is very unusual for us. My older children are playing and my baby boy is snuggled in my arms. I’m typing one-handed.

I haven’t had much time for blogging. My days are filled with reading good children’s books, homeschool, dishes, laundry, cooking, nursing, playing, cuddling. All good things, but the dishes and laundry are usually the most neglected.

At night we do baths, bedtime stories, prayers, and lights out. Bug is struggling with sleeping in his own bed. I’m often up with him until 10 or 11 p.m. Nighttime is the hardest. I miss my husband so much at night. When everything is finally quiet and my thoughts can wander, I just miss him.

I’m lucky to be able to talk with him as often as I do. I am so thankful for the Internet. Those conversations are getting me through this deployment. To know he is ok, to hear his voice, to laugh and joke, and make plans for when he finally comes home. I know we both need that communication.

Here lately I have been struggling. I’m reading a book geared for the military wife, and I am trying to rely on God’s strength instead of my own, but it’s been hard. Since Mr. Simple left we have battled snow and ice with a power outage, sickness, and now more snow. I have felt helpless. I haven’t even been able to get to the grocery store without help yet, and when others are dealing with their own jobs and sickness it seems nearly impossible to get things done. That really depresses me. Things will get easier, I know. They already have. It just takes time.

I started exercising the other day with Bender Fitness. I am so much more out of shape than I was the last time I exercised! It’s also really, really hard to accomplish a workout with a two year old climbing on you! Oh, well. It’s better than what I’ve been doing, which is nothing!

My hope is I will feel better when spring comes. The weather will be so much nicerand there will be more things for us to do. As much as I hate to rush Baby O’s babyhood, he will be older and it will be easier to take him out and about.

Linking to:

Growing Home, Heart + Home, The Better Mom,

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2 Comments

  1. I know how you are feeling. I am an Air force wife (18 years) when I had 3 littles about your kids ages, we were living in England. I remember how hard it was. Take each day, one at a time. Reach out to the base community. They have programs to help you. I know deployments are hard, not having an adult to talk to is sometime the worst. Missing your husband, at night, all those little thing that seem to happen as soon as he gets deployed. Have faith, HE is watching over you. I wish I could run to the grocery store for you. Keep your chin up. If you have any questions, feel free you email me.

  2. Thank you so much, Colleen. I am fortunate to live close to family who can help me when they can. We did make it to the grocery store with the help of my grandparents! Of course, it’s not the same as having my husband home. I do miss him so much.

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