Mothering and Nurturing Our Kids
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I remember the way I used to view motherhood before I actually became a mother. I couldn’t get past the the cute baby bump and the sweet, sleeping newborn images I saw on TV and in ads.
If you’re a mom, you know I got a pretty big reality check the minute my first child was born. I have really embraced motherhood and I truly believe it is my calling, but like any mom, and especially those of us who stay at home with young children, I have my days where I want to just sit in my room alone for a few minutes.
As I’m going about the house doing chores like laundry or sweeping or cooking, I will often feel a tug at my pant leg, and then I will hear a soft whine from a certain little girl. If I don’t pick her up quick enough, the whine will get louder and louder. Usually while this is going on, my oldest is saying, “Mama come here,” or, “Mama, I need to go to the bathroom,” “Mama, I want some strawberry milk.” It never ends. Someone always needs something.
Often, I feel like I never get anything accomplished, but you know what? That’s not true. I am actually accomplishing something far greater than doing the dishes or vacuuming the floor. I’m nurturing people. Mothering and nurturing our kids is so important.
Our children need us. Yes, at times they must learn to wait while we do things, but as parents we need to spend time with our children. We need to let them know we love them and care about them. Our children are a blessing to us from God, not a burden. I hate when I hear people complain about their kids bugging them. I’m guilty of doing it, too, every now and then, but I have come to realize that when my kids are bugging me, it’s because they need me.
I try everyday to make a conscious effort to actually sit in the floor and play with my kids. We build block towers, play cars, or read stories. Not only do we practice colors and shapes while we play, but we are bonding and building a strong relationship.
I would like to encourage you, especially if you are a stay at home mom, to take some time and actually do something with your kids. Step away from the computer, put your smartphone in a place you can’t see it, and actually enjoy your children. My children often whine because they are bored or just want my attention. When I take the time to just play with them, we have a lot less whining going on in the house.
I wish more generations were more like that. We were raised to be seen not heard and you better not show out. ” Don’t hold that baby, you will spoil it”. Love was not shown. You knew they loved you but they were taught that kids had a place and they were raise without all the attention they get today. You never heard a child speak out of turn on anything and when visiting you went out outside to play or you sat by your mother and did not move. Never ask for anything and only take something if your mother tells you it is okay.
I have to say I respected my parents and they showed all us children the best love they could.
But with each generation that has changed, to where now a lot of that respect has been taking away to “you better buy me this” A lot of us then, wanted our children to have better then us so we spoiled more, but we also had control and respect. But we also felt that we had an imagine to maintain our house so clean that we did not allow the children to play freely. But then the next generation came and most moms worked. They had to, to make ends meet but what they did wrong, is they let their children do what they want because they felt so guilty not being with them. That is the starting of children taking control not parents.
Today’s generation a lot of the mom’s are realizing that their children are worth more then that little extra money, they are being more conservative and doing without a lot of things they really didn’t need anyway and enjoying being a stay at home mom. They also know that they are so much more important then those dishes in the sink or that dirt on the floor. If you come to visit to see if they have a clean house then you are not coming to visit them.
We do need to bring some of the old ways back but in a different way. Spending time with your children, showing them how to respect, their elders and bringing back manners. Showing that having so much material things is not as important as the love of a parent. This I what I believe. I agree some parents treat their children as just another object in the house, or just someone to feed and cloth until you get them out. That is sad, but to keep using the excuse I was raised that way is just what that is an excuse.
I believe there we need to bring some other beliefs back and incorporate some new. Don’t buy your kids, because that is not what they really want. The truth is, they want your love and they will try in what ever way they can to make that happen. I truly believe that is why we have so many kids out there doing things they shouldn’t. They think if they get caught they will get their parents attention even though in the wrong way.
Before getting married, the couple needs to sit down and really talk about having children and what they do believe in how to raise their children. That needs to be put up front, because so many uses the excuse ask mom, no ask dad. You need to get together an stay on track. The children will respect you more, if they know you love them enough to not let them do something you do not feel comfortable with.
So yes Simple Living Mama, you are living the dream that all parents need to think about.
Glad you put it out for us all to see.
PS. But I must say this, all children need to have respect for their elders. Let me say this I believe some parents and people need so show respect to get respect, but in general if you do not know a person and they are older then you, give them the respect. They have been here a lot longer and have seen way more then you can imagine. I had a girl that emailed me one time and said some things, that if she was in my generation she would be picking herself up off the floor. Shows what generation I came from.
Thanks again Simple Living Mama!